Countdown Continues

OOOh! The wedding is just around the corner now! We finalized the location at this newly remodeled Tiki Bar on steroids...with a mini-bandshell and a new wood dance floor surrounded by an outdoor adobe fireplace and palm trees wound with white twinkly lights! I am so excited to glide onto that dance floor with Dave for our first dance as bride and groom. Peacock feathers pinned up in my hair, all a-bling with emeralds, and a little green petticoat peaking out from under the hem of my dress---Ahhhh! I love being daring and adding color to my virginal white ensemble. It's driving my mother nuts, but oh well....it's not like I'm a twenty-something blushing bride in the 1800s.

It looks like we might have hired a band for the dance, and they'll come early to play for the ceremony on the beach. Guitars and an upright bass on the beach!!!!! This will be epic, and far beyond what I dreamed we could do. Mucho gratitude to my mother for lending us a hand, financially. I totally didn't expect that...but she surprised us with a check last week that gave us a huge sigh of relief.

This whole process has been an exercise in letting go. Everything time I get too attached to my vision of how things out to be, it all sort of blows up in my face. If I think I'm not dropping weight fast enough...not down to my ideal size soon enough....well, then the stress and pressure make me eat more. If I get too attached to what music I want played or how the reception will go, something falls apart.

Such an exercise in faith to just let it unfold...and now it's better than I could have imagined.

Michelle (my neighbor) and I have decided to build a little business plan for this summer to put together a weightloss support group. She's getting ACE certified as a personal trainer and I'm sort of being trained by a doctor of natural health to teach others a 12-week nutrition program. We'll combine my knowledge of nutrition and Michelle's knowledge of training and eating for weight-loss.....and we might have a shot at helping some other women. This is motivating me to be vigilant...because it'll be OUR before and after pictures in the marketing materials.

So this week we're starting with an all veggie cleanse. So far so good. It'll be what I need to break the barriers. My weight has been jumping around between 184 and 187 for weeks now....even though I'm getting leaner from lighting weights. Today I'm at 181 and if I can just drop below 180 and stay there then I think the ball will be rolling on it's own from that point on.

But I'm not going to get stressed. If I still have a little bouncy bouncy celllulite on my wedding day, the world won't come to an end. I can't stress about this... I can only affirm my health and well-being.