Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Old Leaves/New Leaves

I'm writing this while buzzing on Vicadin and listening to old LPs of Andy Williams.The Vicadin is for my back. I'm so jacked up that I can't bend over and touch my knees....the result of too much alcohol (causes inflammation) and a hot pair of stiletto boots from the Halloween revelry this past weekend.  

There's good news and bad news. We'll get the bad knews out of the way first. 
I must fess up. I put back on ALL the weight I lost on HCG two weeks ago. I feel like crap, and my joints hurt so much that I couldn't go jogging or dancing if I tried. The GOOD news is that mentally I feel like a million bucks, because I've had a breakthrough. (And Shoshanna is a great coach). I looked in the mirror this morning and saw the huge and ever widening chasm between how I used to be with health and how I am now. I've actually devolved in my behavior. From the overly processed Sam's Club food in my refrigerator, and the consistency with which I drink alcohol, you would never have guessed that I used to be a whole food Nutrition Zealot. I barely recognize myself. Nutrition used to be my religion. I've studied it since I was a teenager and my teachers have said on several occasions that I have the equivalent of a PhD in holistic health.

Yet my behavior now is such a far cry from who I used to be. What happened? I used to have a thriving coaching practice with clients from all over the country, teaching them about advanced and cutting edge nutritional science. I soaked my almonds. I cooked with exotic whole grains. I was like a walking encyclopedia....my family used to call me for advice on all of their ailments. Now I would be embarrassed for any of my clients to see what I eat.Why did I give up and let it all go?

Well, it's sort of like taking a break from being in a religious cult. I just got tired of trying to be so good all the time and I let the pendulum swing the other way. I dated guys who thought my nutritional standards were too high to accommodate and I got so tired of trying to convince them that they were slowly killing themselves that I just gave up....and then, bless his heart, I fell in love with Dave (my fiance) who was raised on good ole' Michigan fare: BBQ ribs, pizza,  Bob Evans sausage and gravy, and plenty of beer. Even though he has been nothing but supportive of my desire to eat well, I think I used him as an excuse to let things get really out of hand. And now I'm about two years into a steady habit of eating late at night in front of the television, way too much meat, and a glass of wine or a drink every night before bed (and much more on the weekends). Sunday turned into "free for all"...donuts, nutella and peanut butter, cookies....whatever we wanted to celebrate the weekend. Who am I? Three years ago I was always on my soap box preaching against these sort of habits. Now I'm 25 pounds over-weight, my back pain is so out of hand that I'm on drugs on a consistent basis, and I have cellulite in my cleavage! C'mon!!!

So here's the part where I realize it's time to grow up. I don't need to be a Food Nazi, but I don't need to completely ignore everything I know either. It's like finding a "middle of the road" church that isn't evangelistic, but not too laid back either. I've got to stand for something!

So here is the "New Leaf" I'm turning over, sort of based on the old leaf I used to be. Back to whole grains and less meat....whole grain hot cereals in the morning are so yummy for breakfast, especially with buckwheat, spelt, quinoa, millet, etc. I love making bean curries and spanish beans and brown rice, to cut down on meat-based dinners. Dave loves them, too. I want to get out all my old cook books from the Master's degree program I was going through in Holistic Nutrition, and resurrect the cooking methods of my ancestors....no need for processed foods...they make me feel yucky anyway.

Foods with an acidic PH are what cause all of my joint pain: sugar, meat, processed foods, and alcohol. If I can cut that down, I'll be pain free in about week. (The next time I write a blog entry). Then I can get back to jogging and dancing.  Alcohol is for social occasions and parties, not every day.

I'm back, World! Eryn, the Health Nut, Returns. Part II.

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